LOVE, FEAR, AND THE UNKNOWN
Six weeks ago my life changed. There was a moment I fell in love with something/someone I loved more than work. I used to joke with friends that my work was my baby and my startups were my children. Now I know how funny I must have sounded to parents of actual children.
The day my little one was born my heart was complete, I knew that there would be no more all nighters putting out fires. I knew I had something more important to do. With that realization I also had fear. Fear that my business would fail due to my commitment level being lower than it once was. I thought about all those talks I’ve heard about women ‘leaning in’ and work life balance. It all seemed a bit daunting at first. How could I lean in with a newborn? Would leaning in too far make me a bad mom? Or would not leaning in enough make me a bad entrepreneur? All these question arose . What I’ve come to realize in the six weeks my new love was born was that work life balance and leaning in was different for everyone. I found myself working at odds hours of the day and night. Fitting in sleep and work when I could and to my shock my business has not failed. It was the fear of the unknown and unanswered questions that scared me.
As women we put too much pressure and expectations on ourselves to be the perfect mom, wife, and boss/ employee. I made a promise to myself to let it go as it goes to and to put my best foot forward and most importantly I would be a mom first. I have come to understand its okay not to be perfect and that in my imperfections I learned more about myself.